My show opening on Friday was a success, if you count the number of people who came out despite the weather, and the many who shared their stories of Loving, posting them on the wall between the paintings. Some of the stories are very touching.
Even so, I woke the next morning in the pit, flooded with anxiety about my next project. I've been so focused on getting this show together and making sure it makes an impact, that now there is a hole where that intense intention was, and panic rushed in.
I lay in bed an extra hour, letting the panic play itself out, to wash over me like a wave, then recede, leaving a call for action in it's wake.
I made clay dragons with my potter friend Joy, in preparation for teaching Dragon Lore to first graders, and talked with my friend Morgan the street musician about how he feels drowned out by amplified sound masquerading as music.
Then I was bone tired, so I napped and read the rest of the day.
Does any one else experience these pits after completing a project, hanging a show, or doing a performance?
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| The pit of my despair has become the wings of my salvation |
I lay in bed an extra hour, letting the panic play itself out, to wash over me like a wave, then recede, leaving a call for action in it's wake.
I made clay dragons with my potter friend Joy, in preparation for teaching Dragon Lore to first graders, and talked with my friend Morgan the street musician about how he feels drowned out by amplified sound masquerading as music.
Then I was bone tired, so I napped and read the rest of the day.
Does any one else experience these pits after completing a project, hanging a show, or doing a performance?
Ah, you need our rescue phrase: "remember, it's the day after a show". It's quite natural to feel down after putting in such an effort and holding the focus of your intention so strongly. I try not to take any thoughts seriously on the day after, since my perspective is bound to be out of whack. I go through all the flip-flops, panics and second-guessing that you describe, but I also remember to repeat the mantra, and I find that helps. I also take long naps and goof off.
ReplyDeleteThe day before the show can be pretty intense, too! Talk about panic!
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