Is is the Devil, or Just Plain Tiredness?

I've been feeling so Turtle-ish this week. So in my shell, reading instead of creating, not even trying to sell my art, to take the necessary product photos, or to apply to shows. Just can't quite figure out what is wrong with me.

Oh, wait, I did finally take some product photos today--93 photos of a dozen scarves. And Saturday I spent all day at the Saturday Market and sold two scarves and a card.

Still, when my business mentor at WACASH called yesterday to check in, I had been spending all day on personal business and most of last week as well, so I felt really......um.....like I've been goofing off. Mentally fogged. Overwhelmed  by what I have not accomplished.

Mark Silver's post,

Is It The Devil, or Do You Just Need a Nap?

really hit the spot. He points out that sometimes tiredness is resistance, and sometimes, it is just tiredness, and he gives some pointers on how to tell the difference.

SOMETHING is missing. I do feel unfocused, unmotivated.
Like I just haven't quite figured it out yet.

I looked at Diane Kappa's web site. Diane is someone my mentor suggested I contact, as she is a painter on silk, as well as a designer who licenses her work. Oh, my heavens, this woman has it together! Her web site alone gives me some ideas on how to proceed, even while showing me how very far I have yet to go!

A Prayer to the God/Goddess of the Green World

Madrona at the Beach
hangs at the Green Spot Tea House and Gallery

Dear God of the Green World, come into my being. Open my eyes to your beauty, my ears to your voice. Fill my belly with your love; My heart is filled with gratitude--but also with sorrow for the violence we do to each other. Guide my hands, my voice, my being, to express Your  Divine Healing Love in all my actions.

***

This morning the birds were my chanters, as though leading a prayer of thanksgiving. And when the birds were quiet, the trees seemed to sing.  The green world was alive and I could hear it, feel it --SO alive!

A Trip Back in Time--China

I didn't find the photo I was looking for, but look what I did find! This was taken when I went to visit my brother in Huzou China in summer of 2009.

Huzou is a city of canals and willows. The lucky people live in those new apartments in the back ground, with heat and air conditioning, but I think the older homes are much more beautiful.

I need to do some silk paintings inspired by the China that is fast disappearing under the "more convenient" pavement and cement.

Clown Angel

There is just TOO MUCH for one person to deal with sometimes:
*The lawn needs mowing; the grass is taller than my grand daughter
*I never did get the chicken house made.
*The deck rail needs replacing before some one falls through it
* I need to make some new frames for the silk scarves so that I can use another technique or two
 *My fig tree and a rhodie have died and need to be removed.
*My son fixed the toilet--and now it doesn't work at all!

Clown Angel

 *A doe sauntered across the yard and headed straight for my garden, ready to eat anything I had dared to plant; I need deer protection for my garden.

Man! I was feeling so overwhelmed, I was on the verge of tears! Then I picked up a pen and this little guy showed up.

 I think he was inspired by the zentangles.

 " Really, silly woman," he seemed to say, "would you trade your troubles for any one elses?"

I think I laughed so hard, I cried!

Zentangles

Danial and Sandy introduced me to zentangles.  Zentangles are kind of like doodling, kind of like meditation. The term was coined by Rick Roberts and Maria Thomas. One source suggests they were inspired by Buddist monks to express the way life has different threads that weave and interweave. You just draw a square about 4" on a side. Then you draw some random lines in it and fill the spaces with different patterns.

 I was impressed with Sandy's zentangles and wanted to try it.

It is fun! I wanted to learn more.
Zentangles have been used in education for:

• Handwriting
• Eye/hand coordination
• Creativity and personal expression
• Problem solving
• Cross-cultural understanding, using various cultural symbols such as Indian henna patterns, Celtic knotting, Zuni pottery, Maori tattoos or Islamic tiling.
• Relaxation and focus

 I found these, and these, and these, just for starters.
And I joined a project at Art42, to make and exchange more.

Zentangle by Maria

zentangle by Maria

The Artist's Creed

I don't remember where I found this....


The Artist’s Creed

I believe I am worth the time it takes 
to create whatever I feel called to create.

I believe my work is worthy of its own space
, which is worthy of the name sacred.

I believe that when I enter this space, I have the right 
to work in silence, uninterrupted, for as long as I choose.

I believe that the moment I open myself to the gifts of the Muse,
 I open myself to the Source of All Creation, and become one
 with the Mother of Life Itself.

I believe that my work is joyful, useful, and constantly changing,
 flowing through me like a river with no beginning and no end.

I believe that what it is I am called to do
 will make itself known when I have made myself ready.

I believe that the time I spend creating my art
is as precious as the time I spend giving to others.

I believe that what truly matters in the making of art
is not what the final pieces looks like or sounds like, 
not what it is worth or not worth, 
but what newness gets added to the universe in the 
process of the piece itself becoming.

I believe that I am not alone in my attempts to create,
 and that once I begin the work, settle into the strangeness,
 the words will take shape, the form find life, and the spirit take flight.

I believe that as the Muse gives to me,
 so does she deserve from me:
 faith, mindfulness and enduring commitment.

Silk Paintings at the Green Spot Tea House and Gallery

The spiritual journey is one of continually falling on your face, getting up, brushing yourself off, looking sheepishly at God, and taking another step. 

- Aurobindo

After hanging my silk paintings at the Green Spot Tea House and Gallery on Wednesday, I was fried! The show didn't look right. Silk paintings that were ironed when I left the house were wrinkled by the time they were hung. Silk paintings that hung well in the studio looked all wrong on the Tea House wall--at least to my eyes. And I forgot labels. 

But, the show was hung, and it was too late to iron. I went home and made labels and hoped for the best, knowing that about 8 people had promised to come out of the 500 email invitations I had sent.

Today was the opening. No one showed up, at least no one I invited. Thank goodness the Tea House owners friends came!

silk painting,  Madrona by the Beach

Now I know the kind of panic I was feeling is natural, the pre show jitters, and the post show depression, but today after the reception, I was in tears! Do I even go on? Eighteen paintings on silk represent a year and a half of work, and none of my friends came to see it! Not even the ones who live in Tacoma!


And yet, I have a show scheduled at the credit union here on Vashon Island in September. I started thinking about the new large silk paintings I want to do for that show, for their big bare walls. It's the place so many Vashon folk took their money as soon as it opened up. We were fed up with Chase, that mega bank that took over our Washington Mutual Bank. My work will be seen there, and people will come to the opening on the first Friday of September, because that's what Vashon folk do.